Try-it-out Tuesdays

I like how December has been a month of firsts. This early I can tell how it's going to be an awesome month!

Last Tuesday, looking to do something to break the monotony of the workweek, A and I decided to eat out for lunch. North Park was value for money as always but A was craving for something sweet so we decided to go to Serendra and get some cupcakes.

image from: http://visitpinas.com/cupcakes-by-sonja-serendra-bonifacio-high-street/red-velvet-vixen-cupcake-sonja/

It was my first time to try Sonja's Red Velvet Cupcake  and I must say it's a mouthful of GVs! I can totally see myself getting one to pick me up when I'm having a bad day. I'll almost go as far as saying that it's tantamount to a cup of Starbucks coffee. And in my book that's a pretty great feat considering how I adore Starbucks' White Choco Mocha.

Tuesday after work, before dropping off A at Serendra for the weekly badminton game, A and I decided to get our brows done at Browhaus for the first time! For someone who never tried threading before, the experience wasn't as scary as I thought it would be and I guess it also helped that it didn't hurt as much as I thought it would. Plus, the ate who was doing my brows was very reassuring and helpful. Note to self: Must get her name when I go back.

I am loving my new brows! They feel rejuvenated and alive and if I may say so, they frame my face nicely and they don't make me look so sleepy or angry all the time. My sister has even been constantly badgering me if I got it semi-tattoed because it looks more solid than scattered.

Okay enough brow-talk, if you have the time, and if you don't mind shelling out a bit more cash than usual (but trust me it's going to be worth it!) visit them at the 2/F of Serendra!

image from: http://www.justcreamy.com/2011/05/brow-shaping-experience-at-browhaus/

Not bad considering it's only just December 6! Life is just an adventure waiting to happen and here's to more adventures to come!


P.S. Thanks A for accompanying me on my many firsts! :) 

Money Mondays

Nov 28 2011

It’s a Monday yet again and with Mondays come the dreariness of another work week. Esp. if you had a not-so-stellar weekend. I actually had a pretty laid-back weekend planned out for myself. A couple of TV shows and a good book to read and maybe a mani-pedi. SOLVED. If you’re wondering why I didn’t’ go out , it’s because 1. I was/am still under house arrest; and 2. I don’t have any more money to spend. (well fine, I still have some but I just didn’t want to spend.)

Anyway, I spent most of my Saturday being a regular Martha Stewart—cooking and doing arts and crafts. Around mid-afternoon, I was about to go out to have a mani-pedi when I checked my wallet/pouch and realized my money was missing. Two frikkin thousand pesos that I set aside to pay for my plane ticket to Bora gone in an instant.

I don’t even know who took it or if someone did take it. Knowing it’s something I worked hard for just made me feel worse. Granted I can always earn it back, but what bothers me is that someone unjustly benefited from something I earned. Come to think of it, this reminds me somewhat of Kant’s ethics. But I’d rather refrain from talking about anything Kant-related, I might say something stupid. HAHA

Anyway back to the missing two grand. As of now, I still have not found it, and honestly, I don’t think I ever will. I’ve written them off as bad debts expense. I’ve asked the house help to turn the whole house upside down just to search for it. It’s amazing how much trouble I would go through for just two simple pieces of paper. Damn.

But hey I still am employed and I’ve got it good so who am I to complain. Besides it’s almost Christmas and Christmas is a time of giving. 

CHOS.

Rainy Days and Cups of Coffee

The past few days have been somewhat dreary, you know, those days when you don't really feel like doing anything, which explains why I haven't been writing as often. What an excuse HAHA. Anyway, there's just something in the air that makes me want to snuggle a bit longer when it's time to wake up. Must be the weather, must be cause Christmas is just right around the corner. Whatever the reason, it's getting harder and harder to wake up in the morning! Damn it. Which brings me to my next point. It's such a pity that I love sleeping so much (yes I am a self-confessed sleepyhead) because there's so much stuff that I wanna do in life that I feel like sleeping is actually a waste of time. Except for the fact that I love it so much. Oh did I just say that again? HAHA Point made!

Living in the here and now is actually such an incredible experience. Endless possibilities present themselves before me. I feel so empowered in the sense that I can actually do something about my dream and turn them into reality. The only problem is which dream?!

image not mine

So there, I'm blogging so that I can chronicle my dreams, aspirations, WTF moments, memorable experiences, feelings, musings, and everything in between. It would be nice to look back in a few years and see what the hell I was up to a couple years back and if I indeed got to achieve my dreams. Or maybe see just how differently life turned out from what I first envisioned it years ago.

Now that I have more time on my hands (aka since I dont go to school anymore and since I dont spend every waking hour cramming reports, presentations and papers), I don't see why I can't do it. But first things first! I'd love nothing more than to sit back and relax with a cup of cranberry white choco mocha and a notebook to sort out my life or just kick back and read a good book in Starbucks. I swear I love that place so much I could spend hours in there! I've even converted friends into Starbucks lovers!
Ah life's simple joys. :)

To be continued tomorrow... :)

11.11.11

image not mine

The 11.11.11 post came a bit too late. I got caught up in the whirlwind of what happened yesterday!
Thursday night I purposely stayed up late to check out Zestair's 11.11.11 sale because I had to buy a return plane ticket from my summer destination next year. Had I checked online earlier, I would have found out that the travel period would be for Jun-Oct 2012. Damn. So instead of wasting the effort I made to stay up late (yes it is an effort for me being the sleepyhead that I am), I checked out twitter and BOOM Cebu Pacific just announced a seat sale at that instant!

I immediately called my friend J who is in Palawan and we both ended up booking a flight to Hong Kong for less than 2300. Not bad for a round trip. Not bad at all! We also got another friend A to come with us. Crazy I know!

I'm not necessarily a big fan of the whole 11.11.11 thing. Too me, it's just numbers and they don't hold any meaning. But I gotta admit, the fact that it only happens once a century is a pretty cool thing.


Ten, twenty, thirty years from now, I'd be able to look back and say, "Hey I booked a flight to HK that day just because." And just like that I had a sudden realization: every day is an 11.11.11 in the sense that it won't happen again. Every day that has passed is a day that is lost and that which can only be relieved through memories.

Cheesy I know, but I guess it was just one of those things that you always knew but took for granted. Something that you'd need a personal experience to make you realize something more than you've already understood before. Do I make sense? Basta.

Anyway, in that instant, I got inspired to be more spontaneous. To see the world. To taste it. To feel it. To live life on edge. Because life is just too short and because I can.

I'm tired but am happy because I'm home and about to enjoy good food.

So if you're wondering why the title to this post is ridiculously long, read on and you'll get it. :)

Sometimes I wonder how the world would turn out to be if all of us had a ticker tape on our forehead with our mood and emotions displayed on them for the whole world to see. Warning: Not in the mood. Do not piss me off. Or: I am ridiculously happy today. You can ask anything of me and I’d probably say yes. Or: Ho-hum mood today, I need a picker-upper. Or: Extremely feeling needy and clingy. I need a hug.

No more hesitating when dealing with people you don’t know that well, or people you just met for the first time. At the same time, you can take advantage of the impossibly good mood of people to get them to do what you want.

Would that’s just be awesome?!

But then again, wouldn’t that be also just so damn inconvenient? Imagine having the following sentence flashing on your forehead while talking to someone at work or in school: I am so irritated with the way you’re acting right now. Can you just jump off the face of the earth? God forbid it’s your boss. Or your professor. HELLLL to NO!

Or imagine being in an interview and this is what you felt at that moment: I feel gassy right now. I’d just die of embarrassment if that were me.

Then again, I think that sometimes it’d be just downright depressing. Because then, there’d be no hiding from your emotions. There’s no denying it anymore. It’s printed on your forehead for crying out loud. HAHA.

Humpday Wednesday

This week just feels too long. And I think I might be coming down with something. Blame it on the long weekends into fooling our only too willing bodies into thinking that we only have three- or four-day workweeks. It's as if my body is rebelling HAHA.

On another note, today has pretty much been uneventful. Just a regular Wednesday at work. The only interesting thing which happened was that planning for the company Christmas party started. I wanted to be part of the design team because I've always wanted to live out my David Tutera tendencies. Sayang. Oh well. Maybe next time. There's always a next time. I hope. Besides I think I can also do a great job in the committee I volunteered for. We'll see. :)

Speaking of Christmas, can i just say Christmas is sooo sooo near but the only place I've felt even just a tinge of the Christmas spirit is in Starbucks? Uh-huh. Yeah. Anyway, I wanted to share with you my realizations and thoughts but stupid me forgot to send the file over to my email. Oh well. Tomorrow. I promise!

All for the Love of a Signature

Too many thoughts running through my mind. I can't even form complete sentences. There's just a whirlwind of thoughts that I need to jot down in its pristine state before anything else taints it, because then these memories won't just be chronicles of what happened today, they would now become the things I want to believe to have happened. Every action would be carefully analyzed and dissected, each motive behind every action rationalized. And this is not what I want to happen so allow me to put down what happened today.

It's been a long long day. Coming from two consecutive long weekends, I was feeling a bit under the weather today. You know Monday blues. But I was actually pleasantly surprised at how fast the day went and how sort of productive it was. I was able to accomplish most of the tasks I set for today. For something that started so bleak, the day looked pretty great.

I was about to go home and I was going about the last few tasks on my checklist. Last item on the list: Have something signed then freedom awaits: I can leave. But I guess things don't always turn out the way they seem. Signee didn't want to sign right away. Had some questions that I didn't foresee and wasn't able to answer. No biggie. I understand Signee's point. If signed, the document will bear his stamp of approval and he will have to know why and what it is for. I'll just ask Other Person the questions Signee has, sort everything out, get it signed.

However, I was unable to get a satisfactory answer from Other Person so Signee refused to sign. There's no need he says. This would prolly have been all right except for the fact that production has already started and is actually in the finishing stages. There's no way I can hold or stop the production. What to do? What to do? I am in deep shit.

Thankfully, BigLilSis was able to help me. She asked Other Person about the things Signee wanted to know. Although the answer was still the same, at least Other Person elaborated and explained why, but still the reason given was not satisfactory.

BigLilSis and I approached Signee together to sort things out. For the most part, I was at a loss for words. There was nothing I could do but keep silent and I am just so thankful that BigLilSis was able to talk on my behalf.

A couple of hours later and a bundle of frayed nerves after, Signee eventually signed it after my apology.
I guess it is my fault that I didn't ask why. That I didn't align everyone with what is happening. That I pushed forward assuming that it's okay to spend. That I didn't seek Signee's consent.

Lesson learned. There's still a lot more I wanted to write, my reflections on the matter, my insights and realizations, but it's probably best left for the next session.

PS It's been a long time since I wrote in this blog. Now, no more excuses to not do it anymore.

Penthouse

So much, and yet so little has changed. To the untrained eye, the place looks just like how it did back when I was a kid, back when I came up during the summers to water the plants and to check on how the flowers were doing, back when there was still Arvie to visit.

This place probably has been the only constant throughout my life and it strikes me that the last time I have been up here was so many years ago. Funny how a place can contain so many memories--some even way back from my kindergarten days.

I don't remember much of my childhood--only that I spent most of it in my Ama's, but visiting this place today reminded me of those times I would come up here with my Aunt to enjoy the night breeze and to gaze at the stars--while eating some ube ice cream. Yeah. Seems like ages ago.

I also used to come up to practice Intrams dance routines. I used to come up here to write. I also used to come up here to visit Arvie..to draw..to play with my cousins. It is so much connected to who I am now, and it almost seems as if it is a kaleidescope of all the emotions and thoughts I have felt during the times I were here.

If a single place were to define me, then I guess this would be it.

Exchange Gifts

Braving long lines at infamously inefficient government offices (kinda reminds me of a certain administrative office in Ateneo) is not exactly one of my favorite past-times. Waking up early in the morning to wait in line with hundreds of people in the scorching heat while the time passes by oh-so-excruciatingly slow...I'd rather sleep in on any given day. I wasn't looking forward to this at all. But then again, if I don't do it, who will?

Being the eager beaver that I am, I already went ahead and got some requirements ahead of time. I don't have a clue about the process involved in securing an NBI Clearance or what I need to bring. But most important of them all, I had no idea where to get it! Which is normal. My knowledge of government offices equals zilch and usually I just turn to Google Maps for a quick answer. Nor did my mom. Now that wasn't a good sign at all.

Thank God my dad knew someone who knew someone where they issue these clearances and knows these processes. Aren't connections wonderful? We took the LRT and we were with a couple of policemen in uniform. I didn't know why they had to be in uniform--for maximum shock value, I guess? It was quite an experience. I felt so bad-ass having these "bodyguards" while walking around the crowded streets of the metro. (so that's how it feels) But then again, I also felt weird. If you know me, I was never one to make a splash; I prefer to be noticed by being subtle and not being over-the-top. Yet here I was, walking with two uniformed men with people gawking and staring. Right.

Anyway, the whole process took less than 2 hours, including travel time. Which is really really fast considering that government offices are usually full of people even during the early morning. But the thing that struck me the most was that it was my first time to witness "exchange gifts" not during Christmas season, if you know what I mean.

The office personnel processed my documents in a jiffy-no lines, no waiting. And in return, I think he got a free ride home or something. All throughout the process, personal favors were called in, names were dropped, calls made, and cell phone numbers exchanged! I have never encountered this before and needless to say, I was flabbergasted. Is this how it works in the "real world"?

I hope not! 'Cause if it is, then life would be just a contest of who knows who, who knows the most people, who's the most well-connected rather than life being the way you make it--through hard work, perseverance, and dogged determination. 'Cause if it is, merit just goes straight out the door. The day that life ceases to be a meritocracy will be a sad sad day for us.

Call me idealistic and naive, but I don't think I'll be availing of this "service" anytime soon. But I wonder, will that even make a difference? Will a lone person making a personal choice affect the system that has grown its roots through centuries of practice? Some say that I'm stupid for not using whatever tools are at my disposal. But I beg to differ. A very wise person once said, "Be part of the change you want to see in others; otherwise you're just part of the problem." I'm sure it was somebody famous who said this, but I forgot who it is. I don't want to be accused of plagiarism, now do I? :)

Side note: I wonder how many "favors" and perks some officials enjoy.

How A Phone Call Changed My Life

Last week, I got a call from an unknown number on my cell phone. And like any other recent graduate, I know better than to ignore it. For all I know, it could be the opportunity of a lifetime. And so it was. One of the companies I so wanted to get into called me for an interview--scheduled the next day! Kind of abrupt I would say, but I'd be a fool to let an opportunity like this go to waste. As people say, you never know what is on the other side. 

The next few days were a blur. HR interview the next day and panel interview the next. I wasn't used to the application process being so quick. Usually it was the other way around, I'd have to practically beg the HR person to give me updates on my application. But this time it was different, and true enough, a couple of days later, BAM! they offered me a job. 

It wasn't a no-brainer, but it wasn't a hard decision to make either. It was a good company with a reputable program that would enable me to go places in a few years. Plus the compensation they offered me wasn't too shabby either--not too much, but not bad for a first job. And although I have never been one to go with intuition, when I stepped in the office for the very first time for the interview, I just felt that I was supposed to be there, like I belong there, like the feeling I got four years ago during the Ateneo Open House. 

And so three days ago, I signed away two years of my life! Funny how a few strokes of the pen in my hand, a couple of signatures here and there, can determine my future. And thus ends my being unemployed. Goodbye sem breaks, goodbye spontaneous beach trips, goodbye bum life, goodbye insanely long summer vacations and hello income taxes, hello overtime, hello rejoicing over holiday economics.

Even though I was ecstatic about landing this job, and believe me, I am very grateful that I did, somewhere in the back of my mind, I can't help but wonder if I had made the right decision. As one of my favorite theology professors once said, "In saying yes, we also say no." However, there is always a but after every statement, and true enough, the very same professor continues to say that, "in choosing we simultaneously become capable of imposing our will on an uncertain world in the sense that we get a say in how our lives play out, and that by doing so we become most fully ourselves. It enables us to grow and mature and become capable of turning possibilities into actuality."

I kinda like the sound of that. That amidst the uncertainty of life, I am still capable of being able to make mere possibilities a reality, of being able to live out my dreams while I still can, of youthful optimism, of home, and of the confidence that someday I will be able to strike out and make it big.

And who knows, maybe someday I just might!

Boracay

The air smells of the sea and its characteristic brinishness and I am reminded yet again of how much I miss the beach. My body craves for it and my mind yearns for it as if I hadn't just got back from the beach a week ago. 

Five days of bliss--of fun, of strolling along the beach, of lying in the sand all day doing nothing thinking nothing, and of partying in the night, of living in the moment. As Sean Kingston goes, sleep all day, party all night! Okay, maybe not the sleep all day part. 

It was a welcome respite from those 4 years of sleepless nights and all-nighters, impromptu presentations, nerve-wracking orals, and of terror profs slave-driving us. The pristine white shores of Boracay was paradise where you can do everything and do nothing. Being able to spend five days there was the sweetest dream. But inasmuch as it was a fantasy it was also semi-anchored in reality. 

For most, Boracay signifies that last summer of youthful carefreeness. But I guess Boracay is the slap in your face that we have made it and that we are seniors no more. And it's back to the bottom of the ladder for most of us. 

*images from joan uy's album and mine :)

In the Dead of the Night

It's 3.50 AM. So why am I awake again at this time of the night/morning? Interesting question. I just came from a three-day silent retreat and yes you may be thinking what in the world does a retreat have anything to do with not being able to sleep? I don't know either but since I don't have anything to do, the retreat went a little like this. Call time was 1230pm in Xavier Hall and we left Manila around 1pm. It took roughly two hours for us to get to the Holy Spirit Mission Service Center Spiritual Formation Center (yeah I think that's about right). Starting Friday around 8pm, there was no internet access, no cellular phones, no readings, nothing. It's just going to be you, your Bible, silence, and prayer.

I must admit, I was daunted by the idea at first; for those who know me, I can get quite a bit talkative and after hell week, the concept of having nothing to do except pray, contemplate, and stay silent was quite foreign. Furthermore, I though that in silence, my own personal demons would come out and devour me. But nothing of the sort happened. Silence came to me relatively easy; it's quite ironic that now, it is with noise I am uncomfortable with. In those three days or so of silence, realizations and profound moments with God and my faith didn't come one after another.

Most of the time it was just the deafening silence. I guess I was too impatient and that I was talking too much. But  the wonderful thing about silence is that aside from its inherent beauty, you begin to notice things that you would otherwise not have noticed. Knowing when to stop and when to rest is a grace. Contemplation is a gift from Him.

Learning to see Him in my life has been a difficult thing for me primarily because I have lived a comfortable sheltered life. I am luckier than most and because I have never been shattered by difficulties, I have never come to Him as much as I mow have. I guess it is true that we notice Him only when we are troubled. It is ironic actually that the blessings that I have have placed a gap between me and Him. I guess the past few days were a troubling experience, to trouble myself that I may be shaken from my state of complacency.
Yes I was lost but in a quite different kind of way from most people.

"Lost is also a place." - Fr. Nono, S.J.

And mulling this over had a profound effect on me. Lost for me always had this sense of despair, of nothingness, and the finality that you would never find your way back because precisely you're lost. You're nowhere. But by virtue of its being a place, it doesn't seem so frightening now. Getting lost might be one of the ways you get found. If you don't lose your way, then I don't think you would know the difference.  I think I still am lost. Saying otherwise might be a bit too presumptuous.

The trip in pictures to follow. Just as soon as I figure out how to work my iPhone!

Waiting at the Lake House

After spending the better half of the day yesterday running errands, I decided to just stay in for a change. I bummed around the house and since I had nothing else better to do, I sat in front of the TV and prepared myself for a night of mindless TV. After browsing through the customary Saturday night fare on TV(i.e. nothing good on TV) I settled for the Lake House. Although the film hit the theaters a few years ago, it was my first time to watch it. Yeah I know, talk about being late. :)) 

Anyway, back to the film. Although a million whys echo inside my head especially with all the logical contradictions and impossibilities (hello philo 103), my heart tells me to see and take it for what it is. Waiting...the central theme of the movie. In a movie where misses and almost have-beens are staple and where taking matters into your own hands prove disastrous, the message couldn't have been any more clearer. Good things come to those who wait they say. But how long should you wait? What if forever passes you by without you even noticing it? Worse, what if you end up waiting for nothing at all? When is enough...well, enough? Where do you draw the line between romantic idealism and sheer stupidity?...between pragmatism and idealism? 

And it got me thinking more. Waiting. Hmm. Well I guess that waiting can be good in its own right, but how does one prevent waiting from turning into resignation? How does one prevent it from being turned into an excuse to not do anything about that certain aspect of your life that needs fixing?

That's a whole lot of questions brought about by a single movie! And even after mulling it over for quite a few hours, I'm still no close to finding the answer. And that's if there is even an answer. Maybe I will know the answers someday, maybe I won't. But for now, the search continues.